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It’s no secret that we live in a world with a perverted value system, and as a result, many people have a perverted image of what makes a woman valuable. Men, how have you been treating women in your life? We tend to treat them how we see them, and unfortunately, many of us see women as challenges, sex objects, trouble, less-than, or anything else but what God says they are.

One of the great challenges of our time is to get both men and women to think and value each other correctly. This weekend I talked about getting back to God’s original intention for valuing women. Here are some important things to know:

1)       Men and women were created equals in fulfilling the plans and purposes of God.

Men and women don’t look equal. We don’t act the same or think the same. It’s our spirit man within that makes us equal. When we get to heaven, it’s not about being a male or a female. It’s about being a spirit. There is no gender in your spirit man. God doesn’t look at your outward appearance, but at your inward – your spirit. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. (Galatians 3:28 NKJ)

2)      Women are a gift from God to man.

God took the woman out of man and gave her to him; she is a gift. I believe the reason some men are alone is because they don’t value women as gifts. The Bible says in Proverbs 18:22 (CEV), A man’s greatest treasure is his wife — she is a gift from the Lord. Every woman is a gift from God to some man, and every woman needs to see herself as a gift, not try to prove that she’s a gift.

3)      Women are a reflection of how well they’ve been valued by men.

The only reason men don’t see women as a gift from God is because there are some women that don’t act like they’re a gift. When a woman doesn’t act like a gift, it’s because she hasn’t been treated like one. Somewhere in her journey, she has been devalued, and she reacts to that devaluing. When a man really values a woman, her wounds begin to heal and she changes.

4)      When a man values a woman, divine order happens naturally.  

There’s a divine order for the way relationships work, just like there’s a divine order of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit in heaven. The Bible says Jesus while on the earth was totally submitted to His Father, and the Holy Spirit is submitted to Jesus in a divine order.  When God forms the family, He says there has to be a leader. God created man first, and He appoints him as leader, not to dictate and dominate, but to be a great servant that values his family. When a man values a woman the way Jesus values the church, she will naturally flow into a divine order with him.

5)       The power of a man’s life is multiplied when he values a woman.

The enemy knows if he can get men and women at odds with one another, he can strip us of the power of two! Two are better than one. A man is more powerful with a woman than he is by himself, and when you put Jesus in the center of it, it’s a three-fold cord that cannot be quickly broken (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 NIV).

There’s more to this critical message for single men, married men and all women! Watch it here.

How many times have you been frustrated when communicating with the opposite sex? It’s hard to count something that happens so often. Sadly, that’s the reality for many of us. Because we’re so lost when it comes to understanding each other, our way of “communicating” at times is to shut down, ignore, talk over, or just flat out refuse to talk to our spouses, sons, daughters, co-workers, parents or friends of the opposite sex. We see it as a dead end. But we’re looking at it wrong.

It’s been an absolute pleasure to have Dr. Caroline Leaf with us to talk about how the science of the brain is finally catching up to what we already know in the Word of God. The brain is a wonder. The God who created the heavens and earth is the same God who created us, males and females, and created our brains. We – males and females – have been designed uniquely and our brains are wired to think differently. When it comes to relating to one another, we really can do better. Dr. Leaf points out that each of us has 3 million years+ worth of space inside our brains, so we are designed to constantly grow new thoughts, and we’re also mentally equipped to be able to really relate to each other and understand each other. We have no excuses!

Dr. Leaf teaches these three C’s:

1)       We are designed to complete one another, not compete.

2)       We are designed to be compatible, which means “fit together.”

3)       We are designed to be complementary, which means “to contribute to and improve each other.”

Click here to watch Dr. Leaf address these three C’s, along with the differences in the male and female brains, how we think, how we communicate, how we process our emotions, anger and stress, and ultimately, how we can be on the same page!

Whether we want to admit it or not, a lot of us are carrying around some kind of hang-up about race or other cultures. If we’re not, then we know somebody who is. Even though more than 100 nations are represented at Victory, and Reconciling Cultures is part of the vision of this church, topics on race relations or cultural barriers are still sensitive ones to talk about. Our experiences run deep and any scars left behind are very real, but ask yourself this important question: “How much of my life do I live based on race and earthly culture and how much do I live based on Kingdom culture?”

When you belong to Jesus, you now have an opportunity to demonstrate to family, friends, neighbors, co-workers and everyone around you that you no longer see them how you used to see them.  As a new creation living a new creation life, you do more than just tolerate others. You set out to embrace all people and reconcile them to Jesus and to one another.

We know that every day we are influenced away from this kind of Kingdom culture. History, Seeds of Bad Theology, Politics, Economic & Educational Inequities, and Secular Media are five barriers we need to overcome in order to reconcile with each other. I talk about that more here, but I want to emphasize some principles that will help people break the barriers that keep them apart.

1)      Embrace Kingdom culture over earthly culture.

The culture we grew up in forms our thinking, and everything we do filters through our earthly culture – the way we dress, the music we listen to, the way we talk, the people we vote for, etc.  How much more are you focused on your race vs. the human race?

2)     Embrace righteousness and justice.

Righteousness is living right; justice is doing right. If we really want reconciliation, we have to try to look at both righteousness issues and justice issues.

3)     Live with the intentional mindset of love.

The thing about Jesus is that He intentionally went out of His way to love people, especially those who were different from Him. Whatever race we are, we need to be intentional about demonstrating our love for other races.

“Therefore, from now on, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, yet now we know Him thus no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation” (2 Corinthians 5:16-18).

Listen to this message, Breaking Cultural Barriers, in its entirety.

Who doesn’t love a good story? Some pull us in more than others, but the ones we really connect with are the ones that change us. We’re moving into the time of year when the baby in the manger story will be everywhere. But how often do we think about the story of the Almighty Artist who existed before existence? Imagine what He felt when He spoke the first Word that birthed creation. Picture the sights and sounds of the scene as light and life unfolded for the first time. Then imagine the Word becoming flesh and blood – Jesus – who would walk the streets of Earth, sharing and relating to people just like you and me.

No other story is more fascinating than God’s story. There are laws, parables, miracles, ministry and more, but the most amazing thing about this story is that God’s high purpose is for us to be in relationship with Him, just so He can love all over us. It’s God’s story, but what is so profound is that it’s your story too.

I challenge you today to read the Bible differently than you have in the past. If this means spending more time in it, do it. If it means being more intimate with it, do it. Unplug or wake up earlier if you have to. Make it a real experience, not just something you check off a list. Pray before reading and ask the Holy Spirit to show you how the words on the pages connect to your life. To close out this year strong, go for a goal to lose yourself in the depths of God’s story.

We live in a world of busyness, and if you’re a doer like so many people are today, you find it hard to just “be.” It may even sound ridiculous to you, but it’s one thing God desires – for us to really BE with Him, to consistently pull away and spend time with Him. It’s called rest. Do you know how to do it? Until we figure it out, we will never really be satisfied in life.

This is an information society, and we know a lot! But the smartest among us don’t know how to rest. We’ve come up with our own interpretations. We play hard to balance out working hard. We get lost in television or the internet, or we turn to our favorite food or treat to help us chill out. We do all of these things and it pacifies us in the moment, but we never get to the root of our restlessness.

We do have better options. Jesus is just waiting for us to accept His invitation to enter into a real rest.

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” Matthew 11:28-30 MSG.

How do we enter that place in Jesus? What do we need to do to get a rhythm of rest going in our lives? Pastor Colleen gives us these steps:

1) Be alert and aware.

Awaken your spirit. You are a spirit, so you need to answer the desires of your spirit. We call ourselves alert and aware, but how much of what we know comes from the world and how much comes from the Spirit of God?

2) Be attentive.

Pay attention to the only One who can truly validate us.

3) Be consistent and patient. 

Remind yourself of what He says in His word and stand on it. Be stubborn! Learning how to step back out of that daily grind and take a mini Sabbath trains you to stay connected with Him.

Think you’re ready to take a real rest? More details about it from Pastor Colleen are right here!

We love the idea of living a fulfilled life, but how do we actually make it more than just an idea? First it’s key to remember that it was never God’s will for us to live defeated, sad, depressed, or underneath circumstances. While the enemy is satisfied seeing so many believers miserable, Jesus says He came so that we could have the opposite – abundant, full life (John 10:10).

Once we’re convinced of God’s will, we need to ask ourselves, how badly do we want it? Are you hungry for a full life?

Consider your calling, your gifts and your passion. These are three things I call the Trinity of Fulfillment, and when these three work together, you’re living the abundant life.

1. Calling

Do you believe you have a calling from God? Do you know what that calling is? When your hunger for God becomes greater than your hunger for the things in the world, you begin to discover what God is calling you to do.  To live in rhythm with God, we need to live in our calling

2. Gifts

Don’t compare yourself to others. God designed each one of us with specific gifts to accomplish specific things, and the key to enhancing those gifts is to use them to build up God’s Kingdom. Do you know what your gifts are? If so, are you using them for you or for God’s Kingdom?

3. Passion   

We were created to be filled with fire and passion about something! What drives you in life? What are you passionate about? Beware of the two things the enemy tries to do:  beat you down with trials so you’ll lose your passion, and trick you into becoming passionate about wrong things. Again, when you hunger for God more than the things of the world, you’ll start feeling passionate about something He puts in your heart.

You may be strong in one or two of these areas, or perhaps weak in all of them. Wherever you are, it’s not too late to pursue the most satisfying Jesus-life you could ever live. There’s more to the Rhythm of Fulfillment, here.

This is probably part of the series you’d prefer to skip over! But I challenge you to ask God to connect with you right where you are, and then see what He has for you in this. We’re talking about establishing a rhythm of brokenness – uncovering the pride in us and turning it inside out to create an ongoing pattern of humble living, like Jesus.

If we could dig deep to the root of whatever problem we’re dealing with right now, most of us would find pride. As kids we’re raised to be prideful, and then as adults, pride is further reinforced by our culture. How do we break out of something like that?

We need to deal ruthlessly with whatever separates us from Jesus!  It starts with accepting the reality of nothing. Jesus tells us in John 15:5b, “for without Me you can do nothing.” The hard truth is, in yourself, not only can you do nothing, but you are nothing (Gal 6:3), you know nothing (1 Corin 8:2), and you have nothing (1 Corin 4:7)! That’s a lot of nothing, but when we get that revelation, we start to really connect with God as our all and everything. That’s when pride begins to fade and humility moves in more and more.

Part-time humility is not enough. Jesus lived a meek and lowly life. Here’s what it looks like to live in rhythm with brokenness:

1)      Your life is transitioning from living in the flesh to walking in the Spirit. (Gal 5:19-25)

2)      You’re shifting from trying to be important to helping others discover their value. (Phil 2:3-9)

3)      You’re teachable and correctable. (Prov 18:1; Prov 15:31-33; Prov 15:12)

How are you doing in these areas? What is it about your life that needs to change? Think about these questions as you watch this message in its entirety. Click here!

It seems wasting time has become a way of life for so many of us these days. We’re busy with everything except for what God wants us to be busy with. That’s not okay. Once God’s gift of time is gone – a minute, an hour, a day… – we can’t get it back. He wants us to use it wisely, and establishing a rhythm of time can help us do that.

How Jesus used His time on earth thousands of years ago is still making a strong impact on us today. He had characteristics that show us how to build a rhythm of time so that we don’t run out of time…

1)      Prioritize around vision.

Priority one needs to be time with God. When we prioritize our time around God, we wake up in the morning and seek Him first instead of the world (Matthew 6:33). As you put God first in your day and in your life, you’ll notice that time begins to multiply. Build your time around that vision.

2)      Protect what’s valuable.

What do you value?

Value yourself – God really values you, and He wants you to protect that value over yourself. Do you value yourself well? When people lose value for themselves, it shows up in many ways.

• People may get lazy and don’t do anything with their lives; they may let themselves go physically; have sex before marriage; or start drinking or using drugs.
• They may sacrifice for others to the point of burnout. Yes, we are to live a life of sacrifice for others, but if you end up not being healthy, losing your abilities or skills, getting so emotionally down or depressed that you can no longer help people, you’re no good to anybody.

In scheduling your time, you need to spend some time on you.

Value your family – Do video games and television spend more time with your kids than you do? Are you too busy to value time with your family? The most important thing you can give your family is time.

Value your work – If you’re a believer, you represent Christ as His ambassador. “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.” (Colossians 3:23)   Ambassadors offer their work as an act of worship to the Lord. How are you doing with that?

3)      Produce something that matters.

God is pleased with whatever you can do to make a difference. Find something in your life that matters and invest your time in it. Beware of settling in a career that doesn’t make a difference just to make money for you; don’t buy into the American lie.

Rhythm is about finding that place with God where life works. When we prioritize around vision, protect what’s valuable, and produce something that matters, we begin to establish a rhythm of time that gives our lives new meaning.  Click here for more on the Rhythm of Time and to start building yours.

There’s a lot to think about when you’re on this journey of becoming Jesus’ disciple, but how often do we really think about our rhythm with Him? We can know what our rhythm with Jesus is simply by looking at our own lives. Anywhere there’s breakdown, we’re out of rhythm. But that can get tricky because sometimes we don’t even recognize it when we’re breaking down. Some of us detect the warning signs right away, but so many of us end up hitting the bottom — relationally, physically, emotionally and/or spiritually — before we realize how off track we are. Even Jesus pulled away when life got a little too crazy; He pulled away to stay in rhythm with God.

In this series, we’re talking about the Rhythm of Love first because all of the laws of God hang on His principle of love. Matthew 22:36-39 (NKJ) says, “’Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?’ Jesus said to him, ‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the first and great commandment.  And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’” So, if we can get the hang of these two, we will have a rhythm.

I challenge everyone reading this to take some days to get away with God, not to entertain yourself, but to really get away with Him. I also challenge you to establish the Rhythm of Love in your life. Here’s how:

1) Return to your first love –

• Re-engage your time with God
• Re-focus your love for God.
• Re-organize your values with God.

2) Love, from being loved — How are you doing with receiving the love of God? Many of us struggle in that area. Remember, no matter how much you mess up, He will never stop loving you!

3) Release that love to others  – People don’t know you as Jesus’ disciple by how much you pray, go to church, etc.; they know by how you love other people.

When you’re rooted in love, you’ll begin to operate in the fullness of Jesus, and any breakdowns you’ve struggled with will begin to correct themselves!

There’s more about love that can get us into a rhythm with God. Watch the message here.

Be Rizpah! That’s the challenge before you today from our very own Jeanne Mayo who gives clear direction on exactly what that means for each of us. Not very many people are familiar with Rizpah in the Bible (See 2 Samuel), but she’s a woman driven by remarkable courage, strength, patience, and so many other great attributes. If you’re thinking you already possess those qualities and you’re tempted to tune out, read a little further. Even if you’re thinking this is a woman thing, it’s not.  The real challenge here – which applies to all of us who belong to Jesus – is “more.”

Every one of us could stand to be more of a Rizpah for Jesus. She was determined not to let the vultures and wild animals eat off of the bodies of her dead sons. She stayed there at the site throughout an entire season to protect the bodies and ensure their safety. Despite what had to be a bloody mess, stifling smell, and obvious death, she did not give up! Vicious vultures and wild animals couldn’t intimidate her. She was so filled with love that it cancelled out fear, and she stayed.

Jeanne talked about reaching youth, young adults and anyone else who needs Jesus. We’re qualified to love just as hard as Rizpah, and fight just as hard too. What do modern-day Rizpahs do to beat the vultures away from the lost and not give in to the horrible conditions of spiritual decay around us? Jeanne shares these points:

You’re a real Rizpah if you…

1)      Listen more than you talk. In order to connect, you have to care.

2)      Serve more than you control. Never get too big to serve.

3)      Pray more than you preach. Focus on consistency and not length of prayer.

Answer this honestly:  Could you do better in any of these three areas? What are you going to do about it? Believe in the perfect love of Jesus and accept this challenge to be Rizpah!

It’s hard to forget a character like Rizpah after watching this incredible message from Jeanne Mayo. You’ll want to use it as fuel over and again as you continue on your journey of becoming a fully committed disciple of Jesus.