Shanna and I were living an easy-going lifestyle with little to no financial planning, and little care as to where our money went. We were young and I was making excellent money for someone my age. I had just recently found my way back to God through this wonderful gift of a wife that He blessed me with. Unfortunately we were headed for disaster and I didn’t have the humility to see it coming.
I was changing fields to take a job better suited for our family, but it meant taking a pay cut. I felt we would be fine even though I had just financed a new car, had payments on the wife’s car, and had just bought a brand new 3 bedroom 3.5 bathroom house. Money was tight but we had credit cards for any expense we couldn’t afford. We could just pay for any unexpected expenses later. Of course stuff would come up, and we’d charge it until our cards were maxed out. We were paying the minimum on our credit cards and having a hard time just doing that much. Soon Shanna started to become concerned about where we were going financially. I was so wrapped up in living my lifestyle that I wasn’t going to change, regardless of our financial condition. I wanted my TV, my Internet, my cell phone, my shiny new car, and shiny new house…all of it.
Soon we started missing a bill here and there…the cable bill, credit card bills, car payment. We met with a credit counseling service that helped us lower some of our payments and interest rates on credit cards so we could pay them off. In the end we still couldn’t make the payments because we were just spending too much money on all the stuff we had. Shanna wanted me to take over the bills, but I couldn’t bear to face the truth of our situation and refused to do it. Shanna asked me to meet with some people from the church to help us with our finances. James and Sharon Vincent were kind enough to get real with us about our finances. They used some strong words that I just didn’t care to hear. I wasn’t getting rid of my expensive new car. Sell the house and move into something smaller or older? No way. Drop our cable service? Not on your life. We left that meeting and I was the same person I was before the meeting. Or so I thought.
Not much time passed before things were out of my hands…
First I lost my job, and was unable to find a new one. Then unemployment ran out. I had a few temp jobs, but nothing worked out. Our cable was shut off and the bill moved to collections. Our credit cards went to collections and my car was repossessed from my work parking lot at one point during this mess. We had creditors calling every day. I stopped answering the phone because I was afraid it was someone asking for us to pay up. Some family members helped us get the car back, and helped us pay off Shanna’s car, but it wasn’t enough. I just wasn’t going to give up all my stuff. It didn’t matter. Soon we were missing house payments, and then we received a notice from the bank saying that they were foreclosing on our house. Our house! It was ours, right? I wasn’t going to give it up, but I didn’t know what to do. We tried to sell the house, but to no avail. Our house was foreclosed on and we had to move out.
We moved out of our nice, shiny new house into a rental property that some friends own. Our new residence became a house built in 1945—nothing nice, shiny and new in here. I hated it. No garage for my car. Small bedrooms. One bathroom. This is not how I planned on living. This is what our lack of obedience in our finances bought us, but I was blinded by my own desires, and being a fool, I felt I was right in my own eyes.
I was depressed and angry that this is where we were. I found a new job working with a startup IT company, which didn’t pay much, and looked like it wasn’t going to last. We were getting collections calls every day. I had no idea what to do.
Shanna and I enrolled in Crown classes to hopefully figure out what to do with our finances. We went through the whole course, and while I gained a lot of head knowledge, it still hadn’t made its way into my heart. My heart was still hardened by the loss of our house and feeling like God wasn’t there for me. How could He let us lose our house? Then the cycle began to start up again. My car was repossessed again. This time another family member jumped in and helped us recover it and pay it off. Yet another debt to family incurred. Then the company I was working for closed their doors. I was doomed.
I went to small group one night and my small group leader, Steve Carlson, talked with me afterwards. He had some strong words to say about the way I was leading the home—words I didn’t care to hear, and I let him know that I was doing things my way and that was it. One thing he mentioned is that I needed to take over the finances of the home and lead the home, remove the burden from my wife and take responsibility for it. I didn’t want any part of that.
Months went by. I was on unemployment again, and decided I would start a small IT company. I began asking God for wisdom and direction on how to start out. I had never owned a business before and I had no idea what I was doing. He blessed me with a handful of customers…just enough to start getting by. Something in me felt that I needed to honor that, and to do so I needed to take charge of the home finances. I was afraid. I could see how little was coming in, and how much was going out, and how much we owed to so many. I was so terrified that it forced me to my knees. Before God I begged for provision.
He opened my eyes.
Over the years that we struggled, did we ever go without clothing? No. Did we ever go without food? Even when we couldn’t afford it, it was gifted to us by sources unknown. Did we ever go without shelter? Even when we thought we wouldn’t have a place to live, He provided. He never left me. He had never forsaken me. He just let me make my own way if that’s what I wanted to do. I had to change. I had to put everything in His hands. It was all His. Everything we thought we had, it was all His and He was just letting us be stewards over it. It started to make sense. We were not being good stewards, so God did not bless what we had. Suddenly those strong words spoken to me so long ago in a Red Lobster on Holcomb Bridge Road by James and Sharon Vincent came back to me with such force and such clarity. Those words that I thought made no change in me had, through the grace of God, penetrated my hardened heart, and now were accessible to me. Those words that I thought Steve Carlson had spoken so harshly after small group about needing to “man up” and “take charge” of our finances started to change my thought processes. I wasn’t going to let my family suffer anymore because of the fool I had been, looking at the world through my own eyes and neglecting the wise council that had been given to me.
I didn’t know what to do, but I knew what I had learned in Crown class—get my budget figured out. So I did that, and it was ugly. We already didn’t have cell phones anymore. We didn’t have TV service, so where do we cut back? No more fancy foods or eating out. Groceries would be bare minimum. God is our provider and He will not forsake us. I believed that. I started making sure we were tithing. I wasn’t good at it. I wasn’t good at being faithful all the time or being consistent, but I was trying. I was still afraid.
God began to show His faithfulness by increasing my business, and my company started growing slowly. Soon I was getting referrals from clients, and I was becoming busier. Money was starting to come in, and the fear of not being able to pay the bills started to drop away. That, however, did not keep the collectors at bay. They still rightfully wanted their money. I started paying off what I could. Payment plans were set up with a few to pay them off. Some ended up being written off. A few years went by and I felt things were going well. We still didn’t have much of anything in the bank, living just a bit above paycheck to paycheck, but God was faithful. Then I received legal papers from a collector who was taking me to court to sue me over a debt we had. It was thousands of dollars that we didn’t have. God came through again. Business was increasing, and before we got too close to a court date, we had the money that we owed. We contacted the creditor and paid it all off without having to go to court. God is good.
After paying that debt, we were still sitting pretty low on funds but making it without having to ask for handouts or bailouts. Unfortunately I also noticed that my IT business was slowing down. Fear started to creep in again and I found it hard to tithe consistently, let alone give above that. A dark cloud seemed to settle over me as I began to wonder if I could even find a job out there if I needed to. If I could, would it offset the cost of childcare (as I was now a work from home/stay at home dad)? I had to trust in God and stick to HIS plan for my finances.
Then I became ill.
I had no health insurance and suddenly I was dealing with hives, random cases of anaphylactic shock, and abdominal pains that would hurt so badly I would be confined to bed 8 hours a day. I could barely move at times because of the severe pain. I would be in tears curled up in a ball in agony. Doctor after doctor could not find the cause. Test after test and there were no leads to the problem. I ended up being given narcotic pain killers to just deal with the pain. This was not helping my business or family finances. It was hard to market my business or even work just because the pain was so great.
At some point God reminded me of an event from my childhood. I was 8 years old, lying in my bed watching TV and my abdomen started to hurt. Then the pain came quickly and severely. I was doubled over crying for my mom. She came in to check on me and panicked as she ran to the phone to call the doctor. In that moment, the pain was so fierce that the only thing I could think of was to pray for help. I don’t remember what I said but it was something along the lines of, “God please take this pain away.” Nothing fancy. By the time my mom came back into my room, the pain had been removed. Now here I lay a grown adult, and the same thing was happening again. I wasn’t going to doubt God. I believed in His healing of my daily hives and this mysterious abdominal pain. Months went by and I was still fighting the pain. Business was hurting. Income levels were dropping. I wasn’t adding any new customers or marketing my business. But I still believed. I was not going to consider giving in. My God is more powerful than this. Then, 3 years ago on the first Saturday in December, I went to church. Pastor Colleen had just prayed for healing and restoration over the congregation and afterwards she said she felt a word from God that someone in the room was dealing with an abdominal pain of some type, and that tonight that person would be set free. That night the pain left; God set me free. I still dealt with the hives for years afterwards, but His restoration of my body had begun.
Now I was trying to figure out how to put my business back together. I was down to just a handful of clients, and it was barely paying the bills. Where do I go from here? I didn’t know where God was taking me. I just knew I needed to follow…that I needed to stay on that narrow path and not let my eyes look left or right.
During this time, this season, I became involved in a hobby playing Airsoft (something similar to paintball). I thought it’d be cool to get in on the whole blogging thing, so I began reviewing Airsoft equipment that I already had and posting it on my blog. Soon retailers and manufacturers were sending me prototypes and final products to test and review! I thought that was pretty cool. At this time I also learned how to make a part to upgrade my equipment using some simple electronics I learned back when I was an electrical engineering major in college. Figuring I’d botch it all up, I made several. They all worked. Not only did they work, but a guy I met online on a message board about Airsoft wanted to buy the extras off of me. Now these were crude at best. I was almost embarrassed to sell them, but he insisted and I sold them to him. Now, this guy wasn’t from the USA. He was from the UK, and I had never met him before, nor had I ever really talked with him or messaged him online before. He just heard about the part I made and wanted one. He contacted me again after trying out the parts and wanted 10 more of them! I built 10 more (much less crude this time), and sent them to him. He told his friends, and word spread in the online community. Soon his friends wanted them, and their friends, and people all over the world.
God was opening yet another door for me.
Here I was, pretty fresh to the community of Airsoft players, and my name was circling the globe as people wanted this product I made in my home workshop. I began making a few here and there for people, shipping them around the USA, over to the UK, France, Sweden, Norway, Argentina, New Zealand, even Indonesia! What started out as something so crude became a well-polished product and a hit across the world. Business was growing. The gap between what I no longer made in IT was being filled; but not just with any form of income. This was something I liked doing. I began doing what I did for fun as my job! That was just the start, though.
Here we are, about 2 years after I made the first prototypes, and I’ve sold these the world over. People throughout the industry know my blog and my products. Someone once referred to me on a message board as “legendary.” I couldn’t believe it. I prayed to God to show me the next step. Where did He want me to go? I sought council and this time I listened. I started developing the website for my new company, Infected Armory. My site went live and now I not only build this great product, but I became a full service repair and upgrade shop; all from home (so I can still be a stay-at-home dad), while still providing for my family! The gap in our finances was overcome! One of the largest Airsoft retailers in the world is here in Atlanta. Over time I became good friends with them. When they heard that I was starting up a service center, they invited me to put my promotional stuff and business cards in their store. Hundreds of people a week can go through that store. Thousands of people every year buy products from them. Now when people call them and ask where to take their equipment for service, it’s my company they recommend! God is so good!
Recently, I was thanking God for giving us enough to meet our needs. I was thanking Him for showing us how to be faithful in the little things. I prayed that He would begin to show me how to be faithful in more. He answered back with a stern rebuke. He reminded me of the parable of the widow’s mite. She gave all she had. Everything. What am I giving? Now I started thinking. Well, I’m trying to save up for a van for the family. We also have a trip to Colorado we want to take, as it might be the last time we see Shanna’s grandmother who has had some health complications. I also wanted to put some money in savings so that we would have extra. God was clear with me. She gave it all; what was I willing to give? Just my tithe? No, that’s not enough. If the widow could sacrifice all she had, I could stretch myself more. Out of obedience I started to give more. Not a set amount, but whatever I felt led to give when I tithed. Then God blessed us again. We were trying to make this trip to Colorado happen. I knew that even if I couldn’t get the whole family out there, I had to at least send my wife to see her grandmother. God had blessed my business enough that we could afford to fly her out there and back with a bit of spending cash and she could stay with relatives. But God wasn’t done. A family member, who we rarely talk with and are geographically removed from by thousands of miles, sent us enough money to make the trip happen for the whole family. Not only did the entire family get to visit Shanna’s grandmother, but the trip gave the kids an experience of a life time—a road trip across most of America. We even managed some very nice hotels for what you’d spend for budget hotels! God blessed us with a wonderful trip, an amazing experience, and a great reunion with family some of us had never met. It was a blessing beyond words.
Here we are six years from our Crown class graduation almost to the date.
Are we where we want to be? Not yet. We still owe family members money, and we are working to pay that debt. Are we in need? No, we never had been. God is our Jehovah Jireh. He is our provider. We never went without food, shelter or clothing. My business is growing; my wife is now director at her job and has received several raises. My kids are happy, our bank account is growing, our debt is shrinking, and we are giving more into God’s kingdom than ever before.
All the time, it had been MY foolish pride that caused us such heartache and such pain. I wanted all this world had to give. I was ready to drink it all up and lounge in the world’s gifts. I can just imagine the look of sadness upon God’s face as He watched me destroy our finances, but now I know He’s smiling as I continue to give into His kingdom, pray for His direction, and obey His word. Sure, I still make mistakes and we still have a way to go, but this time we’re following God’s lead. Everything belongs to Him, and we will be stewards over it until that day we kneel before Him. I pray we will hear Him say, “Well done my good and faithful servants.”
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